Monday, December 21, 2009

Hi all. Its raining here today I guess with it being the wet season and all. I have had a really confronting week. We came to Karratha with my daughter and her husband who got work the day after we arrived and are doing really well. Emma is 21 and very overwieght now. I have watched her slowly lose her confidence with every kilo gained and it just really upsets me. She had her work party this weekend and I was out shopping when I ran into her. She was shopping for a dress. I could see at first glimse that she was struggling with it and when I rubbed her arm and said 'want me to hang out with her and help you' she just burst into tears. I had forgotton those days of misery but in that instant I was right back there. I was again 20 years old standing in a flash dress shop when the woman behind the counter looked up and screeched across the entire shop 'we dont have your SIZE in here' and the shame that engulfed me. I once again felt the horrible shame of standing at racks not being able to find a size 22 and sweating trying to heave my frame into something that didnt stand a show of getting on. Now, I am standing before one of four of my most treasured possessions feeling the pain so well. I cant discuss this with her because the times I have tried she is very defensive and full of pain but this particular day I as gently as I possibly could said to her 'hon let me help you and walk with you a while through this'. So fast forward three days later and we are doing the whole healthy eating and walking thing. I have also said to her if in a year she is in the same place then I will pay for her to have WLS because I truly dont believe she can lose it AND keep it off so if WLS is her saviour I fully support her. Presently she is not in the place where she will consider it which at 21 I think is just fine but I dont want her to wade through 20 years of shameful, painful heartbreak and then have it done. Will keep you posted.

3 comments:

THE DASH! said...

Oh, Dianne,
You are such a brilliant, caring mother. Your daughter is so lucky to have you and together, hopefully, you will help her feel like she can reach a better place.

Hope the move and everything with it went well. Have been thinking of you.
Merry Christmas too!!
Cara xxx

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SLB said...

My mum must go through those feelings with me. Having herself struggled with body image for years, I have too for as long as I remember. I look forward losing the weight for good once surgery happens, and taking a weight off my mums mind as well.
On another note - I grew up in Karratha and miss it terribly, would love to move back up but it's so hard without a big company behind you - expensive. Hope you are enjoying it xxx